John G. Miller’s newest book (written with his wife, Karen) is Parenting the QBQ Way. Through practical advice and heartfelt stories, they show parents how to strengthen their families by being intentional in their parenting.
I had the privilege of meeting John and his daughter Kristin at a conference earlier this year. They were generous, engaging and kind. In them, I saw the relationship I want with my children when they are adults.
***I was given a copy of Parenting the QBQ Way by the author for agreeing to read the book and write an honest review. I received no other compensation for this review. This post contains affiliate links. The opinions expressed are mine.
QBQ means “The Question Behind the Question.”
Are you asking the right question to get the response you want?
“When we ask better questions, we get better answers.”
QBQs start with “How” and “What” instead of “Who,” “When” and “Why.” Using these words helps to eliminate victim thinking and instead shifts control back to the parents, where it belongs. Personal responsibility is the key to effective parenting (and life).
Tools outlined in this book help you stop asking the “whys.”
- Why doesn’t my child listen?
- Why isn’t my child a better student?
- Why does she keep whining?
Instead, it challenges you to ask the hard questions (hard because they’re aimed at us, the parent), the “whats.”
- What can I do to understand how my child feels?
- What can I do to be a more positive person?
- What can I do to effectively teach my child today?
This book will help parents who are looking to create strong families by raising children who understand the value of personal responsibility in their lives. But for that to happen, we, as parents, must ask the tough questions. We must be willing to do the work.
Here are some of my favorite quotes:
“Family stress is a choice.” Are you leaving time just to play or are you too busy running from activity to activity without thought to their value or the stress they create?
“Elevate your expectations.” Your children don’t have to become a stereotype. They can excel if you teach them that they can do better; you expect them to be better.
“We can’t be the best parent possible while reliving the past.” We all have regrets. But clinging to the past mars your present and teaches your child that it is okay to be stuck, to be a victim.
Although it is a quick read, it is not an easy read. Their words challenged me page after page.
Each chapter consists of a particular parenting issue and includes personal stories and ideas for improvement. I think this is a book every parent should have on their shelf.
Have you read this book? What is your opinion?